Lip Service The Blog: Don’t Force Me To Lie

Lip Service The Blog: Don’t Force Me To Lie

Something you hear almost everyone say is, “I hate a liar” or some version of this.

People SWEAR they want the truth and maybe they do; but guess what? Some information is NONE of your business. You may be curious. You may want to prepare yourself for any unexpected encounters but I rather cross that bridge when we get there. You may want to know what my real thoughts are about you. Either way, some things should be kept off limits. Here are the top five things that women and men shouldn’t ask each other.

1) “How many people have you slept with prior to me?” In reality, that’s a very irrelevant question. The real question is, “Do you have any diseases?” It wouldn’t matter if they had sex with 1 person or 100 people. Do you have herpes, HIV, gonorrhea, chlamydia, etc.? Some people will argue that they want to know just in case you both run into someone they had sex with in the past. Even then, SO WHAT! If it was before you, then you don’t have grounds to question me. I absolutely am going to tell you I had five sex partners like every woman is supposed to. Ladies, don’t say three because then you look like you don’t know how to drive your vagina. You need it to be a little more experienced!

2) “How many abortions have you had?” This question is something that men and woman ask each other also. Girls ask, “How many girls have you gotten pregnant in the past?” Although your curiosity may get the best of you, the better question is, “How many kids do you have?” Do not follow up with the question, “Any abortions?” Beyond it being super uncomfortable and inappropriate, it’s just NONE of your business.

3) “How much money do you make?” I actually would love to know if you can afford me or not from day one but it will just have to wait for me to figure it out via your card getting declined or finding your paystub in your messy drawer. People are very secretive and/or sensitive about their salary. Don’t ask me a question like that until we are in a real relationship.

4) “Am I the best sex you ever had?” Why would you ask that question because most people will lie and say, “Yes” even though it’s not true! Every guy I ever had sex with thinks they had the biggest penis I ever had. It’s called ego stroking. Do you really want me to answer truthfully and say, “No, it was actually John from two years ago.”? If you were the best sex I ever had I will volunteer that compliment AND have sex with you for free so you will know for sure.

5) “Whose pussy is this?” If you ask this question I’m going to say, “Yours,” but the last person I had sex with probably asked the same thing and I said it was his also. Why ask that question? Did you really want me to tell you that it was mine or Kevin’s from the gym?

Save yourself from getting lied to.